Wednesday, February 3, 2010

The Perfect Storm




Between the hours of four and five-thirty each evening, something strange happens in our house. Yours too? It's the time when the baby suddenly gets fussy and needs to be held. She must know that a higher elevation is the safest place for her to be for what is about to unfold. At the same time I'm holding the baby in one arm (or have her strapped to my belly in a front-pack), I'm preparing dinner. I'm chopping onions with sharp knives, frying foods in hot grease and boiling pots of steaming pasta! It's dangerous work. As if this wasn't enough, my older kids seem to find it the perfect time to gang up on their mother and declare war. Last night was the perfect example. Events beyond my control all seemed to converge and descend upon us all at once. The perfect storm:

Last night we had a delicious dinner of wild rice, marinated salmon, green peas and the sauce of red delicious apples. :) I try to have dinner ready by 5:00. 5:30 at the latest, because my kids start to gnaw on the table legs and declare that they "will just have to hold their tummy" if they don't get food immediately. Last night I wasn't fast enough, and they stole a box of fruit snacks from the cupboard and ate the entire box between themselves in Yaks' room. What in the world? Have they forgotten every rule, every consequence, and taken leave of every ounce of their senses!? Does hunger do this to children, or is it simply at the between the hours of four and five-thirty?

While I'm preparing dinner, I'm also surveying the main floor of our house, while watching the clock. I'm like something straight out of an Iron Chef competition. Josh likes a clean house. It's important to him. It's important to me too, but it's difficult to do, especially when there is only one of me, and three of them. Each day I try to plan it just right so that things are at least picked up on the main floor, so that when he comes in the door it doesn't look like a bomb just went off in this place. Last night after I got the kitchen looking presentable and the table set, I went around the corner to find every jigsaw puzzle in our cupboard...dumped...mixed...on the floor...the main floor. Yaks was the culprit. I came unglued and left Boo to tend to the baby, while I barked directions and helped with the sorting because picking up all the pieces by himself made him "too tired". Tell me about it, kiddo. The baby screamed for the full 25 minutes that it took me to "help" Yaks clean up the floor. I could feel my blood pressure soaring!

Although Yaks doesn't seem to have much skill in the sorting department, he's a pro at knot-tying! I can't wait until he's in Scouts. He'll ace those knot-tying requirements for sure!

At least once a day, I get to untie one of these beauties. Usually around 5:15pm or so.

I'm not sure why the soldier had to be tied up with that branch. Perhaps he was making a grappeling hook like Bear Grylls does! One night as I was tucking Yaks into bed he said, "Look, Mom" and he showed me this zipline he had made by using his knots and the string of his blinds that were tied to the tower of his toy castle. Then he took on of his soldiers and I watched as this plastic soldier hitched a ride from the top, down to the bottom in two seconds. It was really something....to undo!

As I was madly trying to pick up the house, untie the knots, calm the baby, keep dinner from burning, and most importantly, keep my cool, I noticed this cigarette-looking object on the floor next to the contents of our kitchen first-aid kit. It was something rolled up.

I unrolled it and found this message.

So true. So true.

I'm happy to report that after Dad arrived home and dinner was eaten ("This fish is cooked perfectly!"), the dishes were done (thanks, Josh!), the kids were happily in bed, and Josh was off to a meeting, I crawled into bed with the remainder of the freezer-burned ice cream and ate every...last...bite.
Another storm weathered, and all was right with the world.

13 comments:

Cara and Steve said...

wow, I don't know how you do it Amy. I just barely got the dishes done that should have been finished 2 days ago and I only have one baby. I also am great at cooking frozen pizzas for dinner... I wouldn't fathom doing salmon with wild rice. I love the pic of Yaks with the pot on his head :)

melanie said...

The truth sounds so humorous in your writings - I relate and also get lot's of chuckles as I read your blog. You are the best.
Melanie

Sarah said...

What a perfectly timed rolled-up message. If only one of those could be found every day around 5:00!! I vote to keep it on the fridge!

I'm impressed with you weathering the daily storms. You SHOULD eat every last bite of that icecream. Maybe even lick out the carton too!

Emily said...

It is amazing....the same thing happens around here about that same time.....I am very impressed with your dinner!!!!

Dianna said...

My mom still calls that time between 4 and 6 PM the colic hour - so appropriate even if you don't have a crying baby. Everybody seems to go to their most ornery self and it is up to MOM to smooth all the wrinkles out by delivering a magnificent meal. Talk about PRESSURE! Well, you are one cool cucumber, Amy. I'm pretty sure I would have been in the corner crying in a heap by the time my husband got home.

Laurie said...

My mother-in-law calls it the witching hour. Everyone falls apart as I am making dinner. I now feed them at 4:30pm it works better for them and me.

Shelese said...

ha! I'm dying laughing. You're my idol and I so relate to this crazy chaos. Love you!

flower7657 said...

Amy, you are amazing! I showed this bog to grandma at HealthSouth where grandpa Quilter is. We both got such a chuckle from the clever way you share the event and the pictures! The sign across the fridge says it all!

Abby Paulsen said...

Amy, I love reading your blog, it makes me laugh and I just think you are incredible! I'm so grateful to have you as a sister in law. I sure do miss the little Yaks, Boo, and little diddles. Thank you for sharing your blog with us, it makes my day! Love ya lots!

Stephanie said...

Wow, sounds so familiar. You have such a gift for writing it! I'm so glad that it's not just my house that breaks into complete chaos every day at 5 pm. It's crazy, isn't it? I find myself telling Bryn most days when he comes home, "The house WAS clean, really, it was." I'm not sure that anyone could believe it by the state of the place. I need to start taking pictures to document my cleanin efforts.

You're awesome, I love reading your blog. It expresses so many of the things that I'm not eloquent enough to write! Love you!
p.s. thanks for the birthday card!

Plowgian Page said...

You are amazing at calming all the storms of life, Amy. The toy scenario sounds familiar. I'm a culprit with the laundry. I love to gather the unfolded loads and leave them out on the bed. When Rob comes home he always joking says. "ah, oh," to which I always reply back "ah, oh," and then I don't give it a second thought.

Nicole said...

what does your main floor carpet look like? I haven't seen mine in years :0) Because yes, the storm does come around 5 PM here too. The rolled up message was PERFECT! my kids once ate 3 POUNDS of pretztels from a Costco size bag that they snuck up to the TV room loft. And then they tried to hide the empty bag under the couch. And mine are 8 12 and 4!!! those boys know better. so alas I have no hope for your furure with older kids.

Sunny said...

I'm catching up on blogs today and I must say, I love your blog! I laughed, had sympathy pains, and enjoyed every minute. Well said, friend!